Dumb Headlines

My friend Judy sent these to me with her comment: “These cracked me up!”

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Worker suffers leg pain after crane drops 800 pound ball on his head
Bridge helps people cross river
City unsure why the sewer smells
Study Shows Frequent Sex Enhances Pregnancy Chance
Meeting on Open Meetings is Closed
Man Accused of Killing Lawyer Receives a New Attorney
Puerto Rican Teen Named Mistress of the Universe
County to pay $250,000 to advertise lack of funds
Army Vehicle Disappears: “An Australian army vehicle worth $74,000 has gone missing after being painted with camouflage.”
Casket  found as workers demolish mausoleum
Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop, Find Weapons
Statistics show that teen pregnancy drops significantly after age 25
Meat Head Resigns
Barbershop singers bring joy to school for deaf
Homicide victims rarely talk to police
Hospitals resort to hiring doctors
Man with 8 DUIs blames drinking problem
New sick policy requires 2-day notice
Parents keep kids home to protest school closure
Police arrest everyone on February 22
Rally against apathy draws crowd
Starvation can lead to health hazards
The bra celebrates a pair of historic milestones this year
Total Lunar eclipse will be broadcast live on Northwoods Public Radio
Rangers get whiff of Colon
Miracle Cure kills fifth patient

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Me thinks there is a job market for proofreaders